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Apartment 23 is bitchy, but could do with more funny

April 12, 2012

Photo: ABC

As full-season shows begin to wind down on the networks, ABC premiered a new comedy Don’t Trust the Bitch in Apartment 23 — oh excuse me, Don’t Trust the B**** in Apartment 23. That’s a bad word, you know.

Here’s a useful rule to follow when naming a show: call it something you can actually say on promos and spell out without offending broadcast standards people. When this show was being promoted in September it was simply called Apartment 23. I don’t understand what was wrong with that. It was vague enough that the show wasn’t strapped in to any one theme and also intriguing to potential viewers, as in, What happened in apartment 23?!

So as you’ve probably guessed, this show is about a bitch (Krysten Ritter) in an apartment. It turns out that she is a bitch with the makings of a heart of gold though (surprise). She’s slutty, doesn’t care what other people think, doesn’t follow rules and takes money from people. She’s also best friends with James Van Der Beek (he’s played by that Dawson guy from Dawson’s Creek). Then this non-bitch from Iowa or Idaho, I can’t remember, moves in. Bitch tries to take advantage of her innocence, but wouldn’t you know, sweet little June (Dreama Walker) turns out to be a sly one herself, and so a beautiful roommateship begins to blossom.

I hate it when shows have characters that are so ruthless. I wouldn’t say it’s not realistic, that they’re aren’t real-life people like that, but there is one key difference between those real humans and how they are portrayed on TV: the people in real life are effing crazy and they are not funny. They are clinically psychotic and anyone with any desire towards self-preservation would run away from them as fast as they can. So I’m not really sure why anyone would want to watch someone like that on TV.

One of the few people who actually had comical lines in the pilot was Van Der Beek. He’s a pretty funny guy, which he showed in some Funny or Die videos he did last year. I do wonder how long he can play a douchey version of himself on Don’t Bitch before it becomes stale.

We probably won’t have to worry about if it gets stale though because my guess is this show is cancelled. Don’t worry, soon another series will surface with the same nutty, spontaneous chick and ambitious, straight girl pairing. It will come sooner than you think, and you’ll wonder all over again why they even bothered.

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3 Comments leave one →
  1. April 16, 2012 7:32 am

    I just wish that Valley Girls had been picked up and she could go on playing CRAZY young Carol!

    SUCH A good episode!

    • April 16, 2012 10:12 am

      That was an amazing episode of Gossip Girl. My favorite moments were when present-day Lily would smile and gaze into her past fondly. I don’t understand why it took them so long to bring present-day Carol onto the show after that episode aired.

  2. October 8, 2012 12:56 pm

    I kept scrolling down your page so I could leave a comment, but I hadn’t seen any of these shows! (We’re too cheap to have cable.) But I did catch this one. It seemed to get progressively worse as the season went on and I don’t think I would bother watching Season 2 if they had one. What a disappointment. I thought the bitch stole the show. She was the only one I really liked! ha!
    Great reviews btw. You make me reconsider cable….well, until I see my electric + water bill.
    😦
    Keep it up anyway!!

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